Sunday, February 15, 2009

There Are Some Things In Life You Just Don't Anticipate

EE cross chicks

Setting: Our bedroom, midnight.

...peep peep peep peep PEEP PEEP PEEP PEEP PEEP! PEEP! PEEP!...

What is wrong with those chicks?

It's not even all of them--it's just ONE. Listen.

I know, it's that one with the weird-looking head. He won't shut up.

Do you think he's brain-damaged?

I don't know. I'll go see. They don't make noise like that unless they need something.

(I go into the hearthroom, retrieve Loudmouth Chick, and bring him back into the bedroom, in a paper towel. He is cheeping his tiny, fuzzy head off. LOUDLY.)

What is wrong with him? What is wrong with you, little dude?

Here, set him down on the towel.

Oh, look at his feet! His toes are all curled up--he can't uncurl his toes! He has toe cramps! That's why he's peeping--his toes hurt! Or he can't make his way to the food and water, and he's hungry and thirsty.

*blink, blink*

Well, he's deformed. We should probably cull him now...

Yeah...should I...?

Wait, lemme look for something first.

What are you doing?

I'm searching "chick curled toes" on Chickenpedia. Watch, there will be 100 posts about it. Yep, here's a picture that looks just like it.

So, what do we do about it?

We have to put it down.

Oh. OK.

WAIT--let me just check a few more threads...

For what, tiny corrective shoes?

Maybe. AHA! (I get up, and come back with scissors, cardboard, duct tape, and the deformed chick.)

What? Are? You? Doing?

I am making a tiny pair of corrective shoes for a baby chicken.

Are you kidding me?

Do YOU want to snap his tiny, fuzzy little neck? Feed him to the dogs?


And that is how I came to be sharing a house with a clutch of chicks, one of whom is currently wearing some stylin' little boots.

21 comments:

  1. Awww seriously! How adorable that you actually made him tiny corrective boots! Too Sweet!

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  2. Did the little guy relax once you made the shoes for him?

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  3. If anyone in the world could (and would) make tiny little corrective shoes for a chicken it would be you. You're a good mama hen.

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  4. I loved you before -- but this post made me love you that much more! You tiny corrective shoe maker you!

    Jewelee from CT

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  5. Next thing we know you'll be putting braces on them too! ...Do chickens have teeth??

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  6. Oh, I need to see pictures, too. Or a video of that poor little chick trying to walk around.

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  7. The sad update: Little Crippled Chick didn't make it. :( Nature is harsh, but this was the only one who I "helped" out of its shell, and really, you shouldn't do that most times. There was obviously a reason that it wasn't able to hatch, and by "helping," I just postponed the inevitable, in this case.

    But darn it, I have now seen several examples of tiny chick orthotics having cured curled toes, so that information is forevermore in my arsenal.

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  8. There's actually such a thing as Chickenpedia?!?

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  9. I want to see a picture of his shoes!!! That is so much a conversation that my mom and dad would have had:o) She saves everyhting.

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  10. "Chickenpedia" = www.backyardchickens.com. Those people know EVERYTHING about poultry!

    Kim, if you search backyardchickens and curled toes, there are pictures of what I did. My little guy just had other stuff going on with him, obviously.

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  11. That was definitely the coolest blog post I've read in months, perhaps ever. I love it that you made the shoes, and I'm sorry he didn't make it.

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  12. ok - this is why I cannot have livestock. I cried over the chick wihthe deformed feet passing and I've only known about him for waht - a minute?

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  13. You are the best Chick Mama EVER. I did giggle a little at "chickenpedia", it's fun to say :)

    oh my GAWD. My word verification is "subea", as in, "Sue Bee", as in, the makers of CANNED CHICKEN. Run, little deformed dude, RUN!

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  15. This is just too sweet. I had to read it to my hubby and he loved it too... Picture please.

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