Tuesday, August 28, 2007

She Is So Me

I have apparently passed on to my daughter that wonderful ability to stew over something and make it bigger, badder, and scarier than it needs to be, so that she's in a state before it even happens. Like today when she had to get four (!!) shots. It started out well enough, and she was talking the brave talk, and in good spirits, laughing and joking.
7.  still happy

8.  preparing to box anyone who approaches with needles

And then, I saw this expression:
10.  thinking too much

I knew that look right away, because it could have been taken directly off my face. This is the look that accompanies fantasies of homicidal maniacs in utility-company trucks, and causes me to make funeral arrangements before any surgical procedure. This is THINKING TOO MUCH. I tried to distract her, tried to get her to play with the camera and talk about books, but the switch had been flipped, and from there it was into dozens of repetitions of, "I am not going to like this. Oh, I am not going to like this." (For me, the key phrase is, "I don't think I can do this." For the record, I've never NOT done anything that I'd first sworn 7200 times I "couldn't" do. But that does not give me more confidence the next time.)
11.  "I Am Not Going To Like This"

She'd already started crying before the nurse even came in to TALK to us. Again, so "me." So I had to respond by acting like...NOT me, and cavalierly brushing off all her terrible worries...as I recalled my own vaccinations at this age, when it took multiple strong male orderlies to restrain me. Oboy.
13.  "I am tryin' to be brave but I just am not."
In the end, it wasn't fun, but it was over quickly (thank God for good nurses...we love our GP, but he RUNS AWAY LIKE A BIG CHICKEN every time a child has to get shots, just like I would if I were him). By the way--if you DON'T love your GP and his/her nurses and staff? Find a new one. Seriously. Life is too short to be annoyed by your doctor. Also, if MY GP is reading this, he should totally give Lisa an extra paid day off. He should also replace all the copies of Arkansas Cattle Business in the waiting area with copies of Mental Floss RIGHT NOW.
14.  almost pulled it off

Oh, and kids? This look right here? This and just a few drops of mommy-guilt will get you a milkshake. And gum. And multiple bedtime stories. Milk it, kids.
18.  explaining that an injustice of this magnitude shall require a milkshake

One last office-management addendum: A couple copies of Highlights might not be a terrible idea. Just sayin'.
3.  Because you can never know too much about shingles  (This Is Today 16)


  1. Ha! Love that she's so intently readin about shingles :D

    Poor Boo.

  2. She is sooo sweet!
    And, really? Is it EVER too early to learn about shingles?

  3. Poor, poor Bella. You should have waited a few days and given her the big girl bed as a prize for being so brave.

    Oh, and......no fair making her wear the DEADLY uniform to the GP!

  4. Oh my goodness! Those were priceless!!! I was laughing so hard, not at her pain but the expressions! And the last pic was sooo funnie. Great post. Came over here by way of paper napkins mystery blog. ;o)

  5. i could die from her cuteness.
    also from the fact that your gp runs away at shot time. that's hilarious.

  6. Shingles has the potential to be serious?! And I'm at risk?!!!!

    I've also seen that head in the hands "I can't handle this" look on the Darling Wife, and she always does. Handle it, I mean.

  7. HA! I have seen that look on your face, right before you had to speak in front of people. You were thinking "These people are going to attack me with knives and guns as soon as I open my mouth". Thinking too much is a terrible addiction, wish there was a support group for it.

  8. And that would be why I would forego the actual speaking in favor of fleeing the room in tears and then vomiting. Hey, coping skills!

  9. great triptik. wow.
    when my daughter got her 3-at-once kindergarten shots last year, she barely flinched, looked at the shocked nurse afterward and said 'yeah, i could've done four'

    also? me. yes.
    challenge my pain, will you?ha. bring it on.

  10. my gawd does she have an expressive face! so cute. i think in the one w/ the kleenex, she's thinking, "okay... how 'bout you put down that camera and we make a break for it?!"

  11. She gets the Survivor award, million dollars and all. My kids (okay, my teens) had a long discussion in the car yesterday about "which shots hurt the worst". I think tetanus booster won.

  12. OMG. I was taken back to the day of "The Kindergarten Shot".

    Except, I'm pretty sure that I was NOT that freaking gorgeous.

    Yup. Definitely not.

  13. Between this and QofS signing Hala up for ballet, I've cried twice in two days about not having a daughter. Curses.

  14. Poor Lil Thing! Then again, I know that my kid picks up on my anxieties...so I had to let my nurse hubby take her for her shots.

    And that phrase, "I don't think I can do this?" That was my mantra 5 hours before I had to give birth - I can SO relate!

  15. You'd think after years and years of poor little children crying over shots they'd have something better.. like a tasty grape drink.. or maybe a piece of medicated gum.

    I mean, we have a patch to prevent pregnancy.. can't they invent a patch to prevent whatever it is they are trying to prevent!?!?!

    I want to prevent this precious little angel from crying!

    And also from the milkshakes as they cause swelling in the belly, hip, and rump area. *nods* You should see me...the swelling hasn't gone down for years.

  16. Ummm, okay, I know, been out of the mix for a minute...

    Poor Bella, I mean look at that sweet kid, poked, prodded, injected with things and not one lollipop to show for it. GP's should have 1) Highlights, at least three years of back issues 2) Lollipops, colored, flavored, crystalized sugar on a stick makes kids happy, hello and 3) Should always give kids their injections if they want the kid to trust them in the future with big things. That's what mine did. And life is too short for crappy doctors, find one you like.

    Oh, poor, poor, Bella, you get your milkshake girl, and a new Seuss book!