Thursday, May 17, 2007

I'm So Honored. And A Little Concerned.

Upon Alex's regaling me with a gruesome story of some poor woman's freak decapitation accident (she survived):

Me: "Honey, PLEASE stop telling me this story, because it is really awful and gross."

Alex: "But--"

Me: "I know that this is the kind of thing that you've been waiting to tell someone ALL DAY, but that someone is not me."

Alex: "But you're my wife! Who else am I supposed to tell stuff to?"

Me: (taking his face in my hands, and speaking sincerely) "You have got to make a friend."

Alex: "But I don't LIKE any other people."*

Me: "And I appreciate the occasional lifting of your contempt for humanity in general in honor of me."


*This is a lie. But he likes to act like it's true.

12 comments:

  1. Now I'm curious. How does one get DECAPITATED and SURVIVE the experience? Could you enlighten me? If you were listening, that is?

    ReplyDelete
  2. From what I gathered before I was totally squicked out (this story, it went ON AND ON, because her head kept "falling off" or something), it was some kind of rare "internal decapitation" in which everything BUT her spinal cord was severed. Or something. Here ya go:
    http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/ap/nation/4811280.html

    Adding the link to the post now, so others may enjoy!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Uh, gross. If that ever happens to me, I hope they let me die. Because knowing that my HEAD CAME LOOSE from my body would squick me out ridiculously until the end of time. DEATH BY SQUICKDOM.

    ReplyDelete
  4. We could get him and my father together. If there's a horrible story in the news, he'll tell me about within 15 seconds of walking in the door.

    ReplyDelete
  5. You would not believe how many conversations involve me repeatedly begging him to stop talking.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Interesting, I didn't know someone could be "internally decapitated"!! I don't like really gory stuff, but find medical cases interesting and love to watch them correct these problems.

    We are always having these types of discussions at my parents home since I was little. Try having dinner with a group of veterinarians, the stories they tell most people can't handle:o)

    ReplyDelete
  7. I don't blame Alex, I don't like other people either. If fact, I generally try to make people dislike me as quickly as possible so they'll leave me alone. Maybe that's why he tells you these stories, I know that's why I would.
    My career as a counselor is going to go splendidly.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I know your pain Belinda. For some reason when I tell people I do not wish to hear horrible stories about horrible things that I can do nothing about it seems to make them want to tell you about it even more. I now put my fingers in my ears and sing loudly until they go away.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm on your husband's side - I don't really enjoy the human race, either.

    ReplyDelete
  10. LOL- interesting. But then, my mom used to read medical journals- she was showing me pics of severely burned people at the dinner table when I was 10.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I remember hearing about some guy in India, I think last year who had the same sort of thing happen.

    Squicky but cook. Definitely not dinner conversation, however.

    ReplyDelete
  12. OMG..that is the freakiest story! Acccck!!

    ReplyDelete