Saturday, November 04, 2006

Dear Bella:

Let me ask you about something I've observed...when I'm in the bathroom, uh, "indisposed," as it were, and one of the dogs comes around, noses the door open, and pokes his/her head in, and I give the command, "goway" (go away), would you like to know what happens? I'll tell you: The dog in question turns around, and GOES AWAY. Admittedly, they don't shut the door behind them when they go, but they do GO.

Granted, we have poodles, which are, according to canine experts, exceptionally intelligent among others of their species. But I've learned from my reading that even a poodle's cognitive skills, such as verbal recognition and the capability to follow commands, is only comparable to that of a toddler's--at most, probably your average three-year-old's. You, my dear, just turned four.

So the big mystery in my life right now is, When I am in the bathroom, pleading for privacy, why can't I make YOU "goway?"

Dogs and horses: SO much easier than children.

13 comments:

  1. If you can make your poodles "goway," I am so absolutely impressed.

    No clue on the training of toddlers, though. Other than, well, actually latching the door.

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  2. Dear Belinda,

    My children are 14. I have not going to the bathroom by myself in about, um, 14 years. They STILL come in and chat with me when I'm 'indisposed'. All the time. Every frigging day. And they comment on the scents, the sounds, etc. N I C E...

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  3. Good luck, I think this will be a continual problem for you:o)

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  4. I know I'm not the only one who did this just now reading this post, but I said "goway" aloud each time I read it.

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  5. I'm almost 24 and I still like to go chitchat with my mama while she's doing her "business." It's the best way to catch her, cause you know she has no choice but to sit there and listen. hehe Just face it, she's never gonna goway!

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  6. Turn the tables on her when she's about sixteen. Be prepared for lots of "Maaaamaaaa! Get ouuuut!!".

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  7. Funny. Really funny.

    When you find out, let me know. I still can't stop my 20 year old daughter from walking in on me in the bathroom.

    CP.

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  8. And, if you ever figure out how to make the poodles close the door after they "go away," I'd be eternally grateful for that secret. Our hall bath door doesn't latch well, and I'm always telling visitors to shut it firmly if they don't want company.

    And, I've been convinced for some time now that they understand English. Lots of English. Just glad they can't repeat some things!

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  9. my question is: how does the horse get in and out of the bathroom?!

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  10. My children would slip notes under the door! Even in a tiny bathroom I could not reach them... If I leave a room even now when they are 23, 17 and 15 they ask, "where are you going?". I live in a 2 bedroom apartment! The cats follow me in too.....
    I hope to go potty alone at age 65...

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  11. I have tried closing the bathroom door, but then I am treated to the highly amusing sight of 5 sets of paws, in various colors, trying to claw their way in. They whine, they cry, they bang their bodies against the door. Then, after all that, there's the Poodles too! LOL

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  12. Dawson must be in the bathroom with me all the time when we are home. I just don't get it. It's like he thinks I'm going to disappear down the toilet unless he's in the room to save me.

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  13. My children are 16 (boy), 14 (girl) and 10 (boy). The younger two still like to just walk in and chat...it's wonderful that we have such an "open door" relationship, however,there are times when a mama just NEEDS to be alone. We've developed "alerts" too, lest they walk in while we're dressing post-shower, or rebuttoning after, well, doing business...mine is an NMA - Naked Mommy Alert...whenever I hear one of them coming near the door, I just yell NMA and it USUALLY works.

    My LargeBoy (the 16y/o) is the only one who understands that the privacy thing works both ways!

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