Let me state up front that I can't take any outpourings of sympathy, so just tie a knot in it now, all you sentimental, sympathetic mush-heads (who I love).
Let's have a chat, shall we? What have been your experiences with pain? I'm honestly interested, because I'm wondering JUST HOW WHINEY AND WIMPY I AM. On your own personal pain chart, what, up to this point in your life, has constituted your "worst pain ever?" Injury? Surgery? A chronic condition? Childbirth? Kidney stones?
I've been down since Thursday, and down hard. Endometriosis is a weird, cruel passenger on the vessel of your body. My symptoms have been escalating rapidly for the last few weeks, and just recently the pain has become my all-consuming, ever-present companion. It hurts, and it hurts bad. I throw up, and have other digestive upsets because of it. I cry...a LOT. I can't concentrate. Blah, blah, blah. It's not just painful, this process, it's BORING. I get tired of talking about it, and I feel like everyone I know is REALLY tired of hearing about it. I've come to dread the question, "How are you doing?" Seriously dread it. I hate lying, but I hate never being able to honestly say that things are all peaches and cream, too.
Long/short of my story at present, is that I'm freshly stocked with a supply of Demerol, and have appointments pending with three different doctors (including a pain management specialist, whee), to try and assess just what condition my condition is in.
So, back to you...how has physical pain affected your life? Have you lost work? Been otherwise ill due to pain? Has it affected your parenting or your marriage? Would you prefer acute pain to chronic pain, or vice-versa? I have had my share of bone-smashing injuries, and I always say I'd rather do that than to have this constant, live-in, there-when-I-wake-up, there-when-I-go-to-sleep hurt. Seriously. Hit me with a baseball bat, break my arm, whatever--just get it OVER with, already.
We took Bella to be fitted for her flowergirl dress, and sitting in that dressing room surrounded by mirrors was a horrifying experience for me. I'm prepared for seeing myself as too heavy, having a bad-hair day, etc., but looking all around and seeing a sick person looking back...well, that was horrifying. I look like I'm in the mid-stage of some life-draining illness. Which I suppose I could be--I was before. And that's scary, so we'll stop talking about it, fiddle-dee-dee.
Other people in my life have accomplished things. Alex has got the Giant Dumpster just about filled up,and also, with the assistance of my Super-Handyman Uncle Jesse, removed the old countertops and sink in the kitchen at the other house, so that we can get going with the new countertops, paint, and get the thing listed.
Even Bella got her warpaint on, using Mommy's mascara. Lovely. How do humorless people have preschoolers? These and more at our flickr pages.