Thursday, June 22, 2006

Back From The Methadone Clinic And On My Way

All righty, then! As a friend told me recently, this space is resembling a Lifetime Movie lately, and I'm ready to turn that around some. There has been grieving, and there's some more to come, but there has also been laughter, hope, and relief.

I'm gonna talk about the relief now. First, much stress was lifted from this weekend's journey to Tennessee for Bella's flowergirl debut in Zach and Angela's wedding when the sweet, wonderful (and incidentally hot blonde bombshell with equally hot-bomb husband) Melissa agreed to take on the task of caring for our sixteen (you read right) animals, plus all the wee fishies in the koi-pond, while we're gone. She's awesome--totally responsible, great with the animals, and they love her. The dogs are not overly thrilled at basically having to live a couple of days mostly crated, but if we boarded them, guess how they'd be living? Yeah. Crated. So at least they're on their home turf, with their own bunkhouses in their own home with their own classical music and all. And Melissa is a familiar face and voice to a good number of the dogs and horses, so that's great. The fish won't recognize her at all, but they wouldn't acknowledge her if they did. They're aloof like that.

Now for the BIG news. I GOT PAIN RELIEF. I'm a little astonished at the source, but after a three-and-a-half-hour consult with the reproductive endocrinologist today, I've been put on Methadone. That's right. I never heard of such a thing--I thought Methadone only came in the Kool-Aid down at the heroin-rehab clinic. Turns out, it's the going thing in chronic pain management. And I may be jumping the gun by gushing after only one dose, but MAN, I feel good, and have much LESS of a "drugged" feeling than I did on Demerol. I would encourage anyone with endometriosis who is dealing with tough pain to CHECK THIS OUT NOW. On top of everything else, it was CHEAP.

Here's the story with the Methadone. With standard pain-meds, you take them when you hurt, and you stress over having them when you need them, so you tend to "save" them for the really bad pain, and by that point, you're "behind" the pain, and it's hard to catch up and get full relief. So you take more, and besides not getting full relief, you wind up running out sooner. Methadone has a long half-life, so offers about a 12-hour window of effectiveness. I take one 10 mg. Methadone tablet every 12 hours, and have the option of taking one extra pill per 24-hour period for "breakthrough" pain, if needed. It's brilliant. I recommend it heartily. Unless you are, in fact, a heroin junkie...I'm not qualified to make recommendations in that case. But my doctor told me that Methadone is also making strides in many forms of chronic pain that are hard to treat, such as arthritis and severe back pain.

Aside from mere pain relief, I am now just beginning to see the sun peek through the clouds, and getting a taste of relief to come when, I'm guessing by Monday or so, I can rejoin the world, and do exotic things like, oh, I don't know...GO TO THE POST OFFICE. Wheeeee! live again? To merely fulfill my obligations? Seems like a nice thing, and I'm looking forward to it.

Tomorrow morning we depart for the much-ballyhooed wedding of Zachary and Angela, holding our breaths in the hopes that Dear Isabella will be in one of her ballerina princess moods when the time comes to do her flowergirl thing, and not in her "Batman Beyond" mode, wherein a magic-wand becomes a death-dealing weapon of doom. I might not ever live down the yelling of "TAKE THAT, JOKER!" accompanied by overagressive petal-chunking. We can only hope.

And--AND! We are travelling in style, in my freshly-detailed (and painstakingly organized by hubby) Tahoe, which is, as of this month (drumroll...), PAID OFF. O-F-F. OFF. Behold it in all its no-payments-due glory:Awwwwww, yeahhhhhhh. It's like having a brand-new car, I'm that excited. We had to stop doing so when we bought the new house, but prior to that we had worked really hard to make extra payments on the Tahoe in order to pay it off early, and we accomplished that. And now we can apply the erstwhile Tahoe payment amount to Alex's truck payment, and get IT paid off early, and then it's ONWARD to putting a dent in the mortgage, to ultimately live debt-free! Dave Ramsey would be so proud of us. Well, he'd probably disapprove of all dog-show-related expenditures, but still. It's progress, and I'm proud of us, a little.

Oh, and happiness? Happiness is a mailbox full of fresh, new, DaveToon shirts, the latest modeled here by Bella, who now refuses to give up her "monkey and a guy" nightgown.This led to a full evening of entertainment for us, beginning with her question, as she regarded the images on the shirt, "Mommy, is this a drawing?"

Me: "Well, yes, Sweetie, it is a drawing."

Bella: "Who drawed this picture?"

Me: "Dave did. Would you like to see some more?"

And so we visited the archives of Blogography, particularly the DaveToon 2006 archives (scrolling quickly past any images containing a cartoon penis--there are a surprisingly good number of these, it being only halfway through 2006 and all). I was rewarded for my efforts with a lot of delighted squealing of such phrases as, "Oh, my, he's NAAAAKEEEED!" (dream sequence with giant, banana-weilding Dave amid swarms of Bad Monkeys), "Look, 'dere's 'dat monkey agay-unn!" And my favorite:

"He is in bay-udd NAKED with a HORSIE--HAHAHAHAAAAA! And he hay-us a ba-nay-uh-na! And there is SPONGEBOB!!! AAAAH HAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!"DaveToons are seriously appreciable to preschoolers, who thankfully can't read yet.


  1. I'm SO glad you found pain relief! What wonderful news on all fronts - paid of Tahoe, less pain, Bella in a zombie shirt... Yay!

  2. Yep... laying in bed naked with a horse while eating a banana under SpongeBob sheets pretty much sums up my life!

    Hey, wait a second...

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  4. Oh baby, happiness is no more car payment!

    Great news on the pain relief!!!

  5. I'm glad to hear you are feeling better. I've missed you while you haven't been yourself.

    It's a great feeling to have a paid off car! I hope you can achieve being debt-free - it gives you a little $ for fun stuff :)

    And I'm looking forward to seeing a photo of Bella in her flower girl dress :)

  6. A paid-off car is such a nice thing, isn't it? Both of ours are. And we're dreading the idea that we should probably get a new one soon. Ick.

  7. I'm glad you are feeling better. A paid off vehicle is wonderful, until you buy a new one:o)

    Have fun at the wedding and I hope Bella is in the right mood.

  8. What a releif to find something that works for your pain. If they made you go down to the kool-aid Methadone clinic you would have some good stories to share, I am sure.

    Good luck at the wedding! I just love weddings.

  9. Wow you sound wonderful! SO glad to hear it...have fun on your trip! Big hugs to ya!

  10. Thank goodness you've gotten some relief. That alone gave me a smile. Plus seeing Bella in that shirt and imagining her looking at a bunch of Dave Toons making astute commentary.

    I noticed how you link to the very post you're worried about your mother reading. Silly girl. Was that after the pain relief kicked in and you were all giddy and stuff?

  11. I heard some about methadone in pain management... it really sounds like the real deal, and I'm very glad it's working for you.

    I want that t-shirt Bella has on.

    Strike that. Need.

  12. You are so sweet, but I'm just excited and honored that you thought of ME to take care of the spectacular Ninja Poodles and their horsie friends!! Oh, and we can't forget the KOI! I'm so excited about getting to play with yard full of PUPPIES that I can't hardly stand it!

    Hope yall have a wonderful trip and that Bella is on her best princess behavior!

  13. P.S. You just reminded me that I haven't worn my Bad Monkey shirt in awhile!!

  14. That last line was so funny I snorted!!!

    SO glad to hear you are feeling less pain. WOOT!

  15. I'm so happy to hear about the Methadone. Now I can refer to you as my "ex-junkie friend in Arkansas". That will make my day!

    Davetoons are VERY appreciated here in our house too, and we don't have to bypass any of the penises anymore. My kids think Dave is hilarious and when my shirt arrived, they were a tad bit disappointed that they didn't get one, or any buttons. But you know... their birthday is coming up!

    I'm praying that Bella is in princess perfect mode for the wedding. I hope you have a blast and we all want a FULL report upon your return. Have a great time!

  16. It is so great to hear all this terrific news. Yay pain relief! Yay paid-off Tahoe! Yay for, well, Bella in general. And I can't stop saying "ba-NAY-uh-na" to myself. Please, when you're up to it, please use to record Bella saying something, anything, so I can hear her sweet voice!

  17. so glad to hear that you got some pain relief! I had no idea about the methadone. Also, fingers crossed that I. was a good flower girl. At my wedding, the ring bearer (the German's nephew) started picking grass and putting it in the flower girl's basket. At least he did not throw it at the guests!

  18. I'm happy for you on the pain relief, doll! Just remember, everything in moderation. One day at a time. Methadone is not the stigmatized drug it once was.

    You're gonna do great! I know it!


  19. Thanks for the info on the methadone. Right now all is well with my spine but after surgery I really have to fight that instinct to hoard the medicine rather than taking it as scheduled so the pain doesn't catch up to you-- you described the phenomenon well.

    Hope you find relief.

  20. Bella. Is. Priceless.

    You need to start a Bella Blog for those of us addicted to her antics and her precious face. A Bella story every day, illustrated!