Thursday, March 09, 2006


It was yesterday, really, but I still haven't gotten over it. Look at them. Butter wouldn't melt in their mouths, right? Ha. HA, I say! (The puppy, Glory, is actually very good. She's not on probation here.OK, on second thought, they both look like they're up to no good. Oh, and the purple sweatshirt/turquoise track pant combo? NOT a Mommy Pick. But it was either that or more of the standard nekkid hooligan syndrome.

Anyway, naughty. Both of 'em. Just EXTREME naughty! Like naughty with Mountain Dew! I don't even want to talk about it yet, but they just...oh, my head.

All right, I'll say this much. It was the kind of naughty in which, while you're dealing with the outcome of one episode, they're committing a whole other crime, and they're in time-out one time after another, with less and less "good" time until finally it's just all time-out. When Alex got home, he didn't say much about Bella sitting silently in the center of the loveseat, facing the empty fireplace. He did, however, ask me, "Why, instead of her own crate, is Delta in the slightly smaller crate? And why is she the only one in here?"

I told him that she was doing hard time in The Hole. And then I told her, "Wagging your tail doesn't get you out of solitary any faster, Missy!!"

Alex wisely retreated, and didn't ask any questions. I think he had judged the space in the big crate and calculated that he would, in fact, fit.

Oh, and Bella took that picture of Delta above. And also some others, which she added to her flickr set. It's mostly nature photos, with a couple of doorknobs, a recurring theme of hers. Me, I like the coffee cup best.


  1. My suggestion? Stock up the bathroom with a good book, chocolate and ear plugs. Hide in there until they fall asleep under the mountain of debris they leave behind.

  2. Let me guess, Belinda insists on dressing herself?

    So what happened? Were the police called? Did you have to post bail? *maidink pulls up a chair and pours a drink* Here, dear, tell me all about it.

  3. *hums* 30 days in the hole...

    So, what'd they do?

  4. Okay, this is nonsense. You cannot tease a story like that with a picture like that and not GIVE DETAILS!

    Take a xanax and talk to us about it! Im dying to know!!!



  5. Belinda, don't make fun of Bella's fashion choices at three years old. I'll tell your blog-friends that you insisted (at age 3) that you wear the red comboy boots (which my mother bought you)to church with the lime green summer frock (I over-ruled you but you gave it a good go).
    Oh, and the reason Bella didn't wear the matching top to the blue pants is that it's in the backseat of my car!

  6. I so LOVE that Bella has her own flickr stream! I meant to comment when you posted her first batch of pictures, but it was late, and I was exhausted, and then I promptly forgot about it!

    She really has an amazing eye. Her photo choices remind me of the floating bag in American Beauty -- such an ordinary, everyday object, but when photographed correctly, it becomes art. I love her choices -- so interesting.

    I especially love those pictures where she is able to center three unrelated things in the same shot -- very creative eye! It's like she already understands the import of different textures and mediums and how they affect the media of photographing. She has truly impressed me!

    Keep on a telling us when she updates her flickr stream -- I don't want to miss anything!

  7. I love so many things about this post. The adorable, bright, fun-in-a-box-and-a-party-waitin'-to-happen child, the great picture of the dog, the flickr photos (which I went to SIMPLY because you mentioned a coffee cup - I'm so easy) but most of all for the comment by your mom TOTALLY BUSTING YOU OUT.

    Yep. I love this post.

  8. WWK--I would, if not for the fear of what I'd find when I emerged. Like, when I fell asleep tonight? WITH ALEX HERE? I left this room only to discover the clean laundry from the dryer in a heap on the floor, COVERED WITH SALT. What is that? I ask you, what is that?

    maidink--I have been dressing myself for at least a decade. But if you mean Bella, yes. What did they do? Oy, the list. So many--no, I need to stay in my happy place.

    erin s--there were many messes, many "accidents," and much hooliganism. MUCH.

    CP--I actually did take a Klonipin. And if it was just "a story," that would be one thing. But dang, it was a perfect storm of misbehavior; an epic tangle of disobedience; a steamy melange of malfeasance. I wouldn't know where to start.

    Mom--But was I a determined NUDIST? It takes tears and threats to get your granddaughter into clothes around the house. And for the record? Those boots were ROCKIN'.

    jessica--thanks; I have the same thoughts about those pictures! For a 3-year-old, she makes some astonishingly interesting choices. The coffee-cup picture, for example, is totally unedited. That's just the way she shot it, and I love the angle and how it's centered, and how it perfectly fills the frame on a diagonal.

    mochaaaaa--Stick around. My mother busts me out on a fairly regular basis. And has curiously little sympathy for me on the challenging-child front. She kind of smirks a lot and says things about "payin' for your raisin'. "

  9. My bad on the name. Bella, Belinda, Belle, I get confused.

    So Bella insists on going au naturale? Mine hasn't hit that stage yet, so I can't help ya. I'd say spray paint her, but she might think that's pretty cool and that would just backfire. Yeah, I'm pretty worthless on this one.

    Red cowboy boots with lime green? You were quite the Beau Brummel in your youth.

  10. I have to laugh at the image of a little girl and her dog sitting facing a wall - both in time out. It's so Norman Rockwell.

  11. Will Bella's photostream feature the poodle's mugshot holding their little pooch prison number board in front of their chests?

  12. Bwah. She dresses like an old lady who doesn't care what people say about her anymore. Very cute.

  13. That ain't naughty you're seeing - it's sassy!